Who Love You, Baby?

Who loves you, baby? Who supports your dreams, hopes, desires and goal? If you can’t answer this, you’re in trouble. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t believe that women (or men) need someone in their life to be secure, but truth of the matter is: when we have supporters, they help us cope.

Leave a comment stating who your supporters are and how they support you. The next post will be an assessment test telling you what type of individual you are. Filling it out can help you discover what type of personality you have and who is compatible with you.

Who Are
Your Biggest Supporters?

Who are your biggest supporters?

Family

Friends

Husband

Boyfriend

Pet

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You’re Oil, the Family is Water

Family can sometimes be very judgmental of the things you do. When it gets to the point where your family constantly discourages you, what do you do? We’ve heard the saying, “Blood is thicker than water,” time and time again, but is it true? In my experience, family will consider themselves water, and consider you oil. What happens when oil is put into water? It rises to the top. I suppose that’s how we must all think.

It sucks knowing that lots of family members don’t believe in you or your dreams until you make it somewhere. Look at how many stars receive phone calls from uncles, cousins, and aunts once they become successful. These same people didn’t know where a phone was to call those stars up and say, “hey.”

Conclusion

If you have a dream of doing anything at all and your family tells you that it can’t be done, or they don’t support you; think of yourself as oil and think of them as water. Though they try and make you seem like the dirty impure mind and spirit, remember that you will rise to the top.

Your Representative, and how they can get you into trouble!

When going out on a first date, or even an interview, lots of us introduce our representatives. You might ask yourself, “Who is my representative?” Well, I’ll be more than happy to tell you.

Representative- your alter ego, the personality that swoops in when it’s time to impress someone. This representative will laugh at jokes you’d normally be stoned faced at. This representative could give a damn about The Apprentice, but likes the show when getting to know that special someone.

Okay, the problem with our representatives is that while they give a wonderful first impression, they are not fully you. We all need to know how to put our representatives on hold and show a potential candidate (boyfriend/girlfriend) the real us. Do this and relationships should last a lot longer than what they last.

So Many Damn Rules When It Comes To Dating

What’s up with these dating rules? There are so many rules that come along with a damn date that it all becomes ridiculous. Remember when a date used to be fun? Of course, we’ve all had our share of bad dates. You met a guy who looks great, is tall, handsome, mature and focused… Well that’s how it appears, because this guy actually sells socks online and only makes about $5.00 a week. God forbid you live in an expensive city like New York. How the hell is this type of guy paying his rent?

Ladies, you’re not excluded. You’ll meet a guy and have on a $200 dollar purse, and less than $10 dollars to put inside of it, yet you’re screaming that a man has to make money and BLAH, BLAH, BLAH. In my experience, it’s a couple’s job- if the relationship ever gets to marriage- to work as a team. Some men still follow the barbaric, “I Work, You Clean” tradition, but that was when women didn’t have as many career choices as men did. Now that women are becoming more doctors, lawyers and POSSIBLE FUTURE PRESIDENTS, do you think I’ll spend $100 dollars on a meal each time I go out on a date and this woman is probably counting more Benjamin Franklins than I am?

Now don’t get me confused with a guy who wants to be supported by a woman. For the sake of romance, I’d pay for the first date, and maybe the second. But if thoughts pop up into our heads about having a relationship, I want her to pull out her pocket book. You want to know why? Because I need to start finding out if we’re financially compatible. If we fall on hard times, can we pull together as a team and work through it? But that’s going way further than the first date, isn’t it?

The truth of the matter is: there are rules that must be obeyed. But at the same time, you were asked to go out on a date because you are a human being, not a robot. And this is real life, not an exam- well I guess it is slightly an exam. But I’d hate for a female to give me an image of a perfect gal and it’s false. She’d tell me, a week later, “Oh, I really am a homicidal maniac. I just wanted to pass the first date exam.”

Assignment from LRL- “Ideal Candidate”

Your assignment, should you choose to accept it, is to write two paragraphs stating what you see in the “ideal” mate. Try not to go for perfect, just try and go for realistic desires. This assignment is due in one week. I will post the most interesting and realistic paragraph. Good luck!

E-mail Advice- "Husband wants to read while I sleep"

Dear Poetiq,

I have been reading your blog for a while. I hadn’t seen many E-mail Advice posts, and I was nervous about sending you an e-mail about my problems. I don’t even know if this will be published, and even if it’s not published, I hope that you can take the time out to answer my concerns. I am having trouble understanding why I’ve given up in my life. I tried to make my marriage work. My problems are not as lewd and outrageous as the other people’s problems who’ve wrote you, but I just want my husband back. One week I want to make it work, the next week I feel like giving up. He’s moved out of the house and I haven’t seen him in a week. We have been trying to get pregnant and I really want things to work out. I am 36 years old. I shouldn’t have to go through this. Please help me.

Erika J.

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Dear Erika,

Thanks a lot for the kind words about Love, Relationships and Life. Yes, I still receive e-mail questions. I have not posted a lot because I wanted to wait until the new blog design was up.

Beyond the lights, glamour and money, most stars live very stressful, and sometimes depressing lives. It’s true. And you know what’s worse than stars who are stressed or depressed, stars who feel this way when they don’t really love what they are doing for a living. The same goes with you, Erika. Be real for a second here. If you ever have to question whether you want to be in the relationship or not, then you shouldn’t be there. And the fact that you are being hurt and a part of you is saying, “leave,” doesn’t make the situation any better.

I understand that you want your husband to be by your side, but you said best yourself: “One week I want to work it out, the next week I feel like giving up.” You want to know why you feel this way? It’s because deep down inside you’d rather give up on the marriage. Oh, yes. Who gets married to feel that type of pain? Yet, when you think about your age and the fact that you haven’t had a child, you choose to stay. Then other questions must facture into the equation: How many friends and family are constantly in your relationship; have you been telling lots of people that you’ll be pregnant soon; and do you expect your husband to change?

Please, write me back telling me how long these problems have been happening, how long you’ve been trying to get pregnant, and how long the two of you have been married. I look forward to hearing from you, Erika

Happy New Year's!

We all welcome in the New Year with a smile and a joyous attitude. We set New Year resolutions and strive for success in our future. Is the New Year a motivational tool? Yes. But it’s funny how many individuals never achieve the goals they set for the New Year. It’s amazing how many people start things in the New Year like trying to stop smoking; loose weight; be neater; or get better grades in school, but it never fully goals through.

What other ways can we motivate ourselves to get our asses up and take care of business? If you want to start your own business, if you want to find love, or if you want to loose the fat, is it safe to say, “Just do it!”? I think so. So happy New Year, and try to work harder and enjoy the new adventures you’ll experience when entering into the later half of this decade.