E-mail Advice- "He wont apologize"

Dear Expression,

I broke up with my boyfriend to test whether he would make up with me and apologize for staring at this one woman at this benefit we went to. The only problem is he has not called me in four days and I feel he might have moved on. What can I do to get him to call me and apologize.

Pissed off woman

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Dear Pissed Off Woman,

It is extremely insane for you to believe that your boyfriend- not husband- will apologize to you because he stared at a woman during a benefit show. I understand that some couples are a tad jealous- Hell, I am very over protective of my girlfriend- but he didn’t have sex with this woman (as far as you know, but that could be the case with any woman he looks or any man you look at).

If I were he, I wouldn’t apologize to you either. And if you broke up with him because of something so silly and unimportant, maybe you two shouldn’t be together. You should be with someone who feels like he is prison. I don’t condone cheating what so ever, but I’d rather my girl looked at another man rather than tried to screw him. Be happy that he is just looking and not touching. If you want him back, call him up and tell him you’re sorry. If your pride is too strong to do that then start looking for another man.

How Important Are Your Goals?

There comes a time in every individual’s life when they must decide how important their goals are. This is where something called “passion” comes into play. How passionate are you regarding your goals? Do you have the indomitable spirit to maintain an optimistic attitude when striving for achievements of your goals? It takes determination, tenacity, consistency and thick skin in order to make it in whatever it is you do. I’m sure you’d agree with me on that.

I know of a female who decided there were a lot of things that she wanted to do. She wanted to go into criminal justice; later deciding that painting was the artistic goal that she wanted to achieve. It turns out that this girl has never finished a painting in her life, but she plans on going to California to sell her paintings. No, wait. She’s changed that to New York City, and she will be selling hundreds of thousands of dollars worth of paintings there within the next few months. Is this a dream or could this be reality?

Hmmm… This doesn’t sound very passionate, does it? When you want to do something, you should have a hunger for it. Let’s say you have not eaten in two days and you haven’t done the thing in which you love to do in two days (be it writing, acting, dancing, painting, producing, directing, relationship matters, or whatever). The opportunity comes along for you to either eat your favorite dinner or get a shot at what you always “claim” you’ve wanted to do. Which one would you take? If you answered this question by saying you’d rather eat that favorite dinner, then whatever it is you’re saying you love to do, maybe you should reconsider.

*If you have any questions that are burning within you, a story to tell or advice to give, please e-mail me at lrl.advice@hotmail.com . I look forward to hearing from you. Your e-mail may be published on LRL.com!

Too Much Damn Love

Too Much Love

Some people find it rather annoying to be hugged up with their loved one too often. Most people would rather their mates didn’t say the words “I love you,” too often, hug them too often, or kiss each other too often. It almost seems like they only want the physical connection of sex.

Now, for all of you who feel it rather stupid to be openly affectionate with your mate, I suggest you tone that BS down a tad bit. I’m saying over-do it, I’m saying that you should open up a little more. What would happen if your mate died, or you died and the last words you said to them was, “I have to shit,” or something? Then what?

Suggestion:

Try telling your mate you love them every time that you are not going to see them for longer than a three hour time span. Again, lots of people feel like this action is going too far, but if would be nice to have your last words be, “I love you,” instead of, “I’ve got to shit.”

When you get the chance, hug and kiss your mate and validate their beauty or worth. Trust me, both you and your mate will appreciate it in the long run…

Coming up…

…more topics on what to do when a lover dies

Related Posts

When Your Lover Dies... How To Deal

*If you have any questions that are burning within you, a story to tell or advice to give, please e-mail me at lrl.advice@hotmail.com . I look forward to hearing from you. Your e-mail may be published on LRL.com!

Saying "I Love You" Too Fast

If you’ve only known your beau for two weeks, is it safe to say that you shouldn’t be telling them you love ‘im? I mean, come on now, how can you love someone when you barely know who they are?

Take SHALLOW BASIC HEIFER, for instance. She was with this guy for only about a week in a half. The guy started spewing all this crap about he loved her. She, of course, felt like he must be telling the truth, because in her experience, a man rarely says I love you quickly. I mean, they were making plans to move in together, though he would only see her for about 15 minutes a day, maybe four days a week. How can you move in with someone and you don’t know how they handle their finances or anything?

SHALLOW BASIC HEIFER took a trip to the guy’s house one day, only to see a “for sale” sign in the front yard. The blinds and curtains on the windows were off and she peered inside to see an empty home. This makes Luther Vandross’ words so potant: “A chair is not a chair, unless there’s someone sitting there.” LOL. I had to add a little humor.

So the guy up and moved, changed his phone number and stopped checking is AOL and Yahoo! Messenger. What is the lesson learned?

When a person says, “I love you,” within the first two weeks, they’re lying. Sometimes people find love a first sight. What you’re experiencing isn’t the case. Turn around and run away… Before they do it first.

How Fast
Do You Say "It?"

How fast do you say I Love You? After first weekAfter first three weeksAfter a month

When Your Lover Dies... How To Deal

You tell your boyfriend or girlfriend that you love them on Tuesday. On Wednesday, the both of you get into a fight and you don’t speak to them the rest of the day. You don’t speak to them on Thursday as well. On Friday they die. What a damn scenario? What do you do when someone you love dies? There have been lots of people who’ve gone through this issue. Someone looses a parent, sibling, uncle, aunt, or cousin. But what happens when you loose a lover?

Shanise, a 25 year old woman- who was married to David, a 27 year old kind hearted man- experienced this lose not too long ago. The pain was palpable, of course.

Knowing that you didn’t say goodbye or that you love them, how would that feel knowing that the last few words you spoke to them was through an argument? That would kill me, personally. And in what ways do you try to get over this? Can you ever get over this?

I will post a series on this topic. If you have any comments, before the posts start, please feel free to leave a comment. Until the next post, much love, peace and empathy.

Related Posts

Too Much Damn Love

*If you have any questions that are burning within you, a story to tell or advice to give, please e-mail me at lrl.advice@hotmail.com . I look forward to hearing from you. Your e-mail may be published on LRL.com!

How To Love Yourself

This week we must try and figure out ways to love our selves more and more. It might be hard for lots of us to find out ways in which we can learn to love ourselves more, but we must make up our minds to understand that we can still be humble as well as have high self esteem. What ways do you tell yourself that you are special?

*If you have any questions that are burning within you, a story to tell or advice to give, please e-mail me at lrl.advice@hotmail.com . I look forward to hearing from you. Your e-mail may be published on LRL.com!

Americans Are Spoiled Like Two Month Old Milk

Have you ever realized how spoiled Americans are? Get closer to us... Really! We smell like two month old spoiled milk that was just squirted out the ass of a Walrus. We always seem to want our cake and eat it to. When it comes to a monogamous relationship, why do people find it so hard to stay with the same person longer than 6 months?

Americans will live in Atlanta, move to California and stay there for eight years. After a while, they’re ready to move somewhere else because they’re bored with the city. They say they’ve done everything there is to do in that city.

So is it safe to say that Americans are never satisfied? And after having our cake and eating it for so long, do we not only want the cake, but we also seek the ice-cream, milk, balloons and party favors as well?

This question was pounding my brain repeatedly. I never understood why we (humans) get so bored so quickly with things before we try and make the situation better. We found it so easy to give up then try because there is always something new and shinny around the corner. We tend to stop appreciating the things that we have.

Hmmm. Something very interesting to think about.

*If you have any questions that are burning within you, a story to tell or advice to give, please e-mail me at lrl.advice@hotmail.com . I look forward to hearing from you. Your e-mail may be published on LRL.com!

Lookin' Like A Real You!

As I sat at home waiting for a taste of the scrumptious chicken BLT salad I purchased from Wendy’s (overly desirous sounds spewing from my stomach), I thought about the pretty painting of perfection everyone tries to paint. When it comes to getting to know someone better, do you find it slightly odd that people give an image of a near “perfect” image? After awhile of dating, or getting to know someone, it’s kind of fucked up that you only find out exactly who they are after a few months of dating. Could this be the reason why there are so many divorces now-a-days? People are so quick to jump into a marriage, though they barely know each other, and come to the conclusion- up to a year later- that they don’t mesh well together.

The question that presents it’s self is: how do you show your imperfect self and still impress someone who you are romantically interested in?

The true answer to this question is: there is no way to achieve this! If a person likes you then they will embrace your flaws. I’d love for someone to be able to take my constant philosophical over-thinking. When my girlfriend and I first started dating, I loved everything about her. After awhile I started noticing things that she kept a secret in the beginning. Luckily for me she let the cat out of the bag, sort to say, a couple of times so I was slightly prepared.

Sometimes these spontaneously clairvoyant discoveries can cause a relationship to befall upon a stronger connection, but in most cases it causes the individual who was left in the dark to feel like they were deceived and cheated into being in the relationship. They’ll say, “I fell in love with a mock-up Jerry (or whatever the person’s name is).” Who wants a lookin’-like-a Gucci when they can afford to buy the real thing?

*If you have any questions that are burning within you, a story to tell or advice to give, please e-mail me at lrl.advice@hotmail.com . I look forward to hearing from you. Your e-mail may be published on LRL.com!

Selling Your Heart on the Street Like A Prosty

If I were a prostitute, I sometimes wonder how much I’d charge. Would I make just enough to get my daily fix of blow, crack, heroine or liquor? Or would I be a classy hoe and charge upwards of $500 per night?

Let’s do the math:

If I charged $500 dollars per night and I slept with six guys that night, I’ll have made $3,000 in one night! Of course, I’d need regulars and they wouldn’t come back every night spending that type of money unless they had some major dough. Well, I’d know my pooh-pooh was fantastic, so I’d make the guy come back more than once a week.

Okay, so we have $3,000 a night so far. Let’s take $1,000 off of each night the next four days, because the regulars aren’t getting into my captivating tunnel of joy. I’ve still made $1,500 dollars a night, times four nights, which gives me a total of $6,000 for those days. Add my regulars back on for Saturday and Sunday and I’ve made $6,000 dollars for those two nights. Now, if we add together all the nights, I’ve made a total of $15,000 in a week! Talk about easy money.

But when it comes to matters of the heart, I feel we can’t be promiscuous with it, just like we morally can’t be hoes with our bodies. If you think about it, multiple relationships can lead to great sex, good kisses, fun times, money (if you’re a gold digger), and slight bliss, yet when your heart is laid on the line, it doesn’t seem like much fun. Just like I’m sure laying your cooch or Johnson on the line isn’t fun either.

So why can men prostitute their emotions for momentary sexual bliss? It’s because their heart’s not in from the jump. Yes, ladies you’ve been fooled. Most men go into a relationship with physical qualities analyzed and they are in hunting mode. Lots of women go into relationships with an open heart. They start off vulnerable and ready to commit. This is the reason why most men can go through relationship after relationship without being burned, while women come out on the other end with third degree burns.

The Question

If we could prostitute our hearts like we do our bodies, would it be worth the moral scarring? After a while, would your heart fall for the women or man you are emotionally screwing? And if you successfully prostitute a million dollars worth of lessons, sex, good times and money, in the end, is it valuable enough?

*If you have any questions that are burning within you, a story to tell or advice to give, please e-mail me at lrl.advice@hotmail.com . I look forward to hearing from you. Your e-mail may be published on LRL.com!

Irony Overly Perceptible 'Cuz of Dumb Ass Choices

Some people make the dumbest decisions (myself included). I’ve never known why DUMBFUCK (a low-life cashier for McDonalds who’s working part-time and living off of his girl) would, for example, choose to screw around with Carla while his girlfriend, BEAT A BITCH DOWN, is on her lunch break. Of course, this guy chooses to do this shit at his own apartment or home, knowing that BEAT A BITCH DOWN has a key.

Are these common mistakes? No, they are careless mishaps or idiotic mistakes. These all come down to finding out the right choices to make and the right times to make them.

A lot of people don’t realize that- in regards to their goals- they have a path to follow. This path goes straight, yet there are always detours in the road (a pitchfork type of look). These detours teach you something, but they still keep your growth towards reaching the goals at the end of the road stagnant.

Yes, sometimes the disappointment and fear of failing is palpable, but we have to jump in there and go at it. When I was younger I would be afraid to ask my family for food when I was starving at home. I wanted so badly to receive that slow yes instead of that fast no that I was terrified. Keep in mind, people that I’m using the word TERRIFIED. I used it to describe my exact emotion, not to over-exaggerate.

So we must ponder the consequences to the actions in which DUMBFUCK caused. Because of his ill-thought decisions, BEAT A BICTH DOWN broke up with him and married a doctor will benefits (Thank you, God. BLUE CROSS, BLUE SHIELD). If he wouldn’t have tripped up and got caught, BEAT A BITCH DOWN wouldn’t have found a guy who loves her and financially treats her well. Irony to the fullest extent, huh?

*If you have any questions that are burning within you, a story to tell or advice to give, please e-mail me at lrl.advice@hotmail.com . I look forward to hearing from you. Your e-mail may be published on LRL.com!